
No, Chef!
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Description
Half the team cooks. Half the team serves. The wall between them ruins everything. A 2-5 player co-op cooking roguelite about teamworking through a tiny window, stickering or drawing orders, lassoing customers, and making rent before the Landlord takes the keys.
Platforms
macOS · Windows
Developer
Fenasal Games
Publisher
Fenasal Games
About
Your restaurant has a design flaw: a wall.
Chefs live in the kitchen. Waiters live in the saloon. Between them sits one tiny window, the only place you can actually hear each other. Everywhere else, your teammate's voice is a muffled blur through the bricks.
Oh, and the rent is due.
TAKE ORDERS FROM ANIMALS WITH PROBLEMS
Animal customers visit your restaurant to taste your chefs' meals. Robots, poets, conspiracy theorists, a sphinx that orders in riddles, and someone's spiteful ex who has OPINIONS about raw food. Decode what they actually want, sticker it onto your notepad, and mind your sticker budget: run out mid-order and you'll be miming "chopped, grilled, three portions" through a wall.
COOK EXACTLY WHAT THE PAPER SAYS
The order paper goes through the window, and now it's the chef's problem. Decode the waiter's stickers, save it to the kitchen, a correct save earns a "YES, CHEF!", a wrong one bounces back in your face. Paper's hopeless? Slam "SEND IT BACK" and let the whole saloon hear the ticket tear. Then survive the actual cooking: stir the pot before it burns, nail the fryer's timing, and hit the oven's group skill-checks together.
THE WALL ALWAYS WINS
Your voice carries clearly to your own side. Cross-role? Nope. The window though? A lifeline. And it gets worse: Violations can pitch the whole team into chipmunks, delay every voice by a beat, play your words back REVERSED, or mute the departments entirely, leaving the waiter one option: draw the order.
YOUR CUSTOMERS WON'T SEAT THEMSELVES
Lasso them off the street. Reel them in like fish. Throw them into chairs (they mostly forgive this). Across multiple shifts AND locations, service gets stranger: customers dangle off cliffs, ride past in race cars, rise from graves and hunt YOU, while traffic and grave hands pick off unwary staff. Serve badly and they'll throw the plate right back.
MAKE RENT. BEAR VIOLATIONS. BUY BRIBES.
Every stage, the Landlord's rent comes due, and covering it means voting a new Violation to 'modify' your shift. Ice floors. Bigger orders. Zombie speed. Your own voices, sabotaged. Spend what's left on Bribes: automation, throwable cutlery, a clone that yeets you across the kitchen, plain-speaking customers. Over 75 cards, a new combination every run.
Miss rent, and it's over. Survive long enough and the FINAL NOTICE arrives, and eventually, the man himself.
"Rent is due, little chef."
Beat the Landlord's gauntlet, and the restaurant is YOURS. The run doesn't end there, it becomes a GOD RUN to explore the power-fantasy of being a chef & a waiter!
FEATURES
- 2–5 player online co-op. Every player experiences a different side of the same disaster
- Built-in proximity voice chat that is also the core mechanic
- Dozens of customer personalities across escalating difficulty, speaking animalese
- 40+ playable animal characters
- A cooking line with real minigames: chopping, stirring, flipping, fryer timing, co-op oven checks
- Roguelite runs: rent, Violation drafts, Bribe shops, Final Notices, one very patient Landlord
- Draw-your-order rounds, and dozens of different violations that change how your team plays the game
- Full English and Turkish localization
A note on voice: play with the in-game voice chat, not an external call. The wall between departments is the whole game, third-party voice apps might destroy the whole fun of your squad. :')